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Why are English people so cold and unfriendly?

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Why are English people so cold?  Perhaps this is the reason so many foreigners fail to integrate properly into society in the UK?  I am a foreigner totally grateful to the UK for giving me a passport (married to a Brit for 21 years) as the chances of being killed where I come from are pretty good.

However, in all the time I spent living in the UK (five years in total), although I'm blue-eyed, blonde and speak perfect English with just a 5% accent, I am always regarded as being foreign.  All my friends are foreign too mainly because we have come to realise we are all in the same boat.

My best friend is Swedish and has lived here in the UK for about 12 years.  Even after that length of time living in the UK she says I am still the only person who has ever invited her home for a coffee!

We're told we have to be patient and that it takes time for an English person to trust you (say four years of knowing you), but then once they are friends with you, they are the best friends in the world. Well, I'm afraid I've given up trying and hoping.

British  and european union flag in London you really don't want us to be here

Is it perhaps because your mothers never breast fed you and thus did not expose you to the first essential human warmth that we should all know?  Or is it because you really are all xenophobic and your government, in its multicultural tendencies has failed to realise this basic truth?  Perhaps it is just because you are SO polite, politically correct and you really don't want us to be here, so instead of telling us sincerely, you pretend to put up with us because you really don't want to become our friends?

Since first moving to the UK, I decided to move away again and have lived abroad for seven years.  During that time I have never failed to make friends with the locals, and quickly too.  So why are the English so aloof with foreigners?

By: Andypandy


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Facts

Facts

Pizzed up, drugged up, 6.9million families debt ridden and stressed out of their heads. The UK must be the most fucked up place to be stuck in. AND, still you all think your'e better than the rest of the world. London's the stab capitol with drug gangs running riot,and the police letting them thin themselves out. What a shit country to reside in. Now try telling me I'm wrong.
Facts
17th Jun 19 15:39

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Rosie rose

Rosie rose

The English are a very cold race indeed I was born in London Westminster in the 60s to Italian parents went to an irish/italian Catholic school and yes they are so unfriendly rude and cold just like the weather everytime I go to France Italy Greece it's sunshine good food no drunken aggressive behaviour and people like to talk to each other and in Thier culture they adore children here they look on them like vermin they care more for their dogs. The street I've lived in for 18 years there's this guy he sees me walk past over the years and boy if looks could kill he always throws me the most evil dirty looks his face is a look of pure hatred sorry but that sums up the English they are a hateful lot very jealous and cant stand to see someone doing well they seem to like to see people fail I think alot are trying to portray they come from perfect respeactful families but in most cases they are most hiding shameful secrets sorry just telling it as i see it must be that WARM Italian bloody flowing through my vains lol
Rosie rose
13th Jun 19 00:56

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From America

From America

I am American and have lived here in for 5 + years. I am super friendly and love meeting and talking to people. The only friends I have not been able to make here are English people. I have friends here who are of other European decent but not 1 English friend. It's disappointing for me. I didn't realise how unfriendly the English are. I've decided I can't take it personally as I used to. I think it's just cultural. I've been invited into the homes of French friends, Welsh friends, Scottish friends etc. but never to an English persons home. I think it might have to do with the fact that English people don't raise their own children. They send them off for someone else to do it. So the English grow up with out much love and affection. No hugs and kisses from their parents. Here in England I don't know my neighbours and when I say hi in passing they don't say anything back. In the states everyone knows their neighbors and invites them over for parties, BBQ's, whatever. Watch a game on TV. Here it's impossible to get to know your neighbours. No one wants to interact and know their own neighbours. I find it quite sad and I miss that friendliness. I am happy I'm here though. I feel very grateful to be in the UK and am a happy expat. I just wish people were kinder and friendlier. One more thing, the misconception that the English are polite was a huge blow to me. People here are quite rude. And the class system is very much still in tact.
From America
8th Jun 19 13:30

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Posing Brit

Posing Brit

@free spriit, It has taken us brits hundreds of years to be the biggest bunch of twats under the sun, don't expect that to change soon. I'm now off to buy a new big BMW just to piss my neighbours off, and demonstrate what a snob wanker Iam.
Posing Brit
3rd Jun 19 15:00

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FreeSpirit

FreeSpirit

I am British, white English to be exact, and I am in total agreement with everyone here. The English are very cold and distant, and the hat filled comments in the Daily Mail are unnerving to say the least.

The British government always say we share the same value as Americans, but nothing could be further from the truth. Americans celebrate achievement, while the Brits condemn it. Americans are more open and friendly, where as in Britain society as a whole is cold, dead, distant, uncaring, too severe and humorless. Where as Americans are more apt to talk to strangers, most English people will not even look at you, much less speak.

Lastly, Americans believe in freedom, human rights, the English just absolutely despises human rights, although these rights are abused to be fair.

I only wish that my countrymen would drop this snobbery, let go of this "holier-than-thou" attitude, speak to people more instead of mocking. They are always boiling over with rage about something, and are never happy.

I am ashamed to be English, we are becoming like the Germans just before the Holocaust, this hate will culminate into something nasty, and it will be the innocent who are once again targeted.
FreeSpirit
2nd Jun 19 18:03

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Watching and Laughing

Watching and Laughing

Don't worry pete, the English people are doing a great job at kicking the crap out of one another trying to prove to themselves they are still important. Every day see's the UK destroying itself from the inside while denying it has a mega problem called snobbery and percieved self importance.
Watching and Laughing
25th Apr 19 22:02

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pete

pete

English reserve is really that they are emotional retards. Bar a sense of humour or being drunk they cannot handle a different opinion and crawl into their shell and ignore you rather than confront the situation. Or they argue using the mind and not the heart.
Also there is a pause between their thought and what they say. They are bad at being spontaneous. The reason they don't invite you to their house is that may give up their secrets.
pete
25th Apr 19 21:02

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Jde

Jde

I think this comments section has been sucking me in too much :) so here's what I think about all of this:

I think the biggest problem is with the lack of real communication between different cultures and misinterpretation of each other's intentions.

Maybe the english need to understand that it's beneficial to have an open conversation with foreigners every now and then and foreigners have to not take their distant attitude too personal and accept them for who they are.

It does hurt when you want to integrate and you can't even talk to the locals for long enough to even know what you're doing wrong and it must be just as scary to see your nation and culture change and feel threatened by a giant mix of new and different people.

Both are fears that we have to let go of. It's the only way we can get along.

I hope that the next generation of kids will grow up together and learn about each other's behavior and cultures without the cynicism and distrust that adults have. It might be a bit too late for us.

Peace
Jde
8th Apr 19 14:46

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Watching and Laughting

Watching and Laughting

@GOW, I think you are living in a dream world old women, abusive or not, it's the simple truth that you and your kind cannot handle. You have constructed a nightmare scenario for your country because of your brainless actions in voting for something you had no idea of. You lot of OAP's have made your beds, now sleep in them.

PS, I hope you have ample funds and savings to survive on cause you will be needing them after the EU takes revenge for causing them so much aggravation.
Watching and Laughting
7th Apr 19 12:56

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grumpyoldwoman

grumpyoldwoman

Yes, you are an abusive idiot. The GOM and I are not up to our necks in debt and have never considered ourselves to be upper class.

The country is up to it's neck in debt because of goverment borrowing (mostly by Labour governments buying voters) and because of the vast amounts we pay into the EU.

We are both old enough to remember that this country managed quite well before we were conned into joining the EU by it's being called "The Common Market". It was, as the name said, supposed to be about trade and NOTHING else.

When we voted to leave we were hoping that it would be over quickly and we could stop paying huge amounts of money into a bottomless pit.
grumpyoldwoman
7th Apr 19 09:57

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Watching and Laughting

Watching and Laughting

@GOW, I take it you mean me as an idiot. Well, seeing as you and your kind voted for the complete disorder, chaos and confusion that BREXIT has created, who's the IDIOT. ( and don't deny that you voted to leave, it's on record of your intent).
Watching and Laughting
6th Apr 19 10:55

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grumpyoldwoman

grumpyoldwoman

Idiot.
grumpyoldwoman
5th Apr 19 09:37

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Watching and Laughing

Watching and Laughing

About time the stuck-up UK tw4ts were given a good kicking by BREXIT. This island mentality that you British are brainwashed with will now be tested to the limit. No doubt many will never be able to modify their rampant snobbery, or even be able to adjust. God, you British are such a total bunch of superannuated W4NKERS up to your necks in debt and still think you are upper class. It's going to be fun watching you all turning on yourselves.
Watching and Laughing
4th Apr 19 16:34

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Alcandra

Alcandra

Even the native Brits wonder why other Brits are so cold and aloof! Well. some Brit was pretty friendly with you because you married one. I am an American, friendly and outgoing. I can talk to anybody about anything except football, American and European. But I am polite at the same time, as are the educated English. They say "sorry" [needlessly] a lot more than I do. They're not really sorry, just a polite expression. And yet I think people who are chatty and complimentary, lack their famous reserve, pretty much scare them. I have gotten the cold shoulder from them, too. Rather than try to get to know you, they prefer to stick with others like themselves, on whom they can count to "know the rules" and not push them beyond their personal comfort zones. They seem to like their friends to be very old ones that go back to their school days. If you are a female, the women may resent you for taking a good man out of the British dating pool and suspect you have "something" that makes you seem more attractive than
they are. Let's face it; the ladies are like that. You won't be able to change the Brits, so accept them as you find them and continue to enjoy your non-British friends and make new ones. There are plenty of those around if you live in a large city.
Alcandra
3rd Mar 19 22:52

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Maria

Maria

This is so true, British people didn’t give me a chance to be friends with them. None of them. I have 5 years living in Essex and only see cold faces as if they are robots. And honestly now I think they must be very unhappy people.
Maria
10th Sep 18 04:03

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