Women who don't buy a round of drinks

MSG You presume to much I have not said any of these things other than I go out. The fact that it broadens my horizons is a bonus. As it happens I am an alcoholic, with a bad temper, people tend to avoid me.

Boblet has a social life because he is a very interesting person whose company people really enjoy. Such an interesting person is Boblet who has a social life with people who enjoy his company. Boblet really is good company who enjoys a social life with other people. Boblet has a . . . . yawn!

I am a woman and I always get my round in. Always. It's not a matter of gender, really. I don't understand the mentality of anyone, male or female, who will stand there accepting drinks off everyone else all night and then shirk their round by going home or suddenly saying they're skint. Or orders expensive drinks when it's someone else's round, but won't return the favour. If you don't want to get in a round, say so when you first arrive. No-one will be offended!

Off out to the Grapes tonight we lost last night at doms 2 games to 3, its Bingo tonight, & a bowls meeting but again it is with real people.

I am going out tonight to the Ring O Bells. The barmaid is good fun, the manager hasn't paid the gas bill so the heating is by wood burning stove. My mate John & I will play Paddy & John2 at fives & threes.
I am posting this in case anything a bit controversial lands whilst I am out in the village world. Touching smelling & listening to real people.

The answer is for women NOT to be allowed in bars!

My favourite bar was men only unless the fire was alight.

Then everything changed in 1972!

The bar is no longer a pleasant place to drink and I no longer go there.

Kat, as you're up at the bar mine's a pint. Oh, and don't forget the dry roasted peanuts!

I always get my rounds in and I am most definitely NOT "one of the lads".

I agree that there are women who do not buy rounds, and, usually, it is not because they do not understand the 'round culture'. They are fully aware of it - they are simply taking advantage. If a woman does not want to be part of a 'round' or cannot afford it, then she should say so. If the men still insist in including her, then that is their problem.

It is simple good manners. Communicate people!

Just don't commit to those customs that you're not comfortable with, and speak openly and clearly with others about your expectations. If you expect everyone to contribute equally, make this upfront. It's when behaviour goes unchallenged, and people get bothered by it, in silence, that people get away with things that impact upon others.

If more people just spoke up and shared what's in their thoughts there'd probably be less need for sites like this, and the other problem of 'haters' that seems to have become widespread of late.

HB's right. The men have had it all their own way down the millennia, so don't expect that a few decades of female assertiveness is enough to reset the balance of the universe.

Had to laugh at that one.

My ward manager gets 4 times the wage I do. The director of nursing, female, gets almost 100k. Woman get an equal wage to men on the same job roles, experience or service time are the only differential factors there.

So that argument died years ago when women pretty much began to overtake men in the "rights" of life.

Maybe women will begin paying for rounds like the men do when we get the same wages as the men do!

First of all, the original article fails to take into account all the likely sociological variables in the given situation.
Men paying is a custom and even those who do not condone this will vouch it’s infixed in the modern social fabric. Your implication that women should step up to the occasion and function on the same level as men is only fair now that everyone has equality, right??? I absolutely support this, and so do all self-respecting and free thinking women. There is however one problem; we ARE NOT living in a world that is “equal across the board.”

To pinpoint this problem as women wanting “equality in areas that suit them,” is inaccurate. If a woman thinks she’s exempt from getting her round in it’s not because she’s aspiring to be a “wallet leech,” I daresay it’s because society tacitly enforced these—unfair to women and men alike—forms of conduct upon its members. And the most ironic factor in the whole equation? Men dominated, well, everything in the past; decisions made in law enforcement, politics, the military and of course male to female socializing. So, unfortunately, all these enduring old-world practices in today’s society that have given you reason to gripe are to the courtesy of MEN in history.
So before labeling women as “wallet leeches” and composing a thoughtlessly constructed argument, take all things into consideration first. You may be bitter that women occasionally reap the benefits of ongoing double standards, but these same forms of etiquette are mostly female-oppressive rather than male—if that restores a perverted sense of comfort to you and any other chauvinist. Yeah, sure, we apparently have equal rights—in first world societies—but then why do people as a whole still labor under the assumptions that women have to prove their worth, to prove their basic rights as fellow human beings?
Lastly, do you have any female friends? Honestly, to credit a woman who gets her round in as “one of the lads” is nauseating male flattery. In your mind women who make positive input or do something commendable suddenly lose their female identity and adopt masculinity? Get these rare females you mention to read your article and wait for their onslaught of “appreciation”.

(Dear Julie) It's even worse here in North America, if a woman buys a drink for a man at the bar, he frowns at her. If a man buys a woman a drink at a bar, she thinks he's being chivalrous, but then he drugs, intoxicates, and/or rapes her, which is even far more dangerous. I know that it is a right to pay your way on a date but the traditional stereotype rule for a woman dating is that she should allow her date to pay his way instead, which often puts restrictions on what women and men can do and what they can't do.

These are interesting points you have raised. I live in Australia and there is a general pattern here. If I am out with a group, I will buy my own drinks. If I know the guys well, they will probably shout me a few drinks. Most guys are genuinley embarrassed when girls try to buy them drinks over here. I personally would not like to be "treasured as one of the lads"...seeing as I am a female and all!

I went out with a girl in 1986, her hobby in nightclubs with her mate was drink cadging off strange men at the bar, once they had got their drinks they dissapeared.

After a six month relationship, so did I.

"Paying your way in the pub" " wallet leeches" .. hmm., you really are a chauvinist, aren't you?
I wonder. how many women come across men who don't pay their way? That's just something no-one ever talks about though, right?
I think the real deal is that YOU want to be a "wallet leech" yourself.
You're one of those spineless males who thinks women should give up their money just for some petty semblance of equality too..
Do men have to?
Oh and you've forgotten that in terms of equality generally in this country women still don't get paid the same as men - so actually if we're talking about equality it's only fair if you people just at least pay for the drinks, right?
I bet you get paid some 3,000 -5,000 pounds more a year than female me, right?
A classic example of a( closet, maybe - I don't want to be unfair) chauvinist manipulating women into yet another feeling of guilt about xyz..

My experience is that when I go out with a group of friends the girls do pay for their round but give their money to one of the males to go to the bar.When it is just me and one of my girlfriends I always pay for the rounds,most men are a bit old-fashioned in that way so you cannot really blame women.