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No child support from wealthy family

I am a 21 year old student and I am 5 months pregnant.  I was with my partner for two and half years and we have recently split up due to family pressures.  He comes from a wealthy family and I am tired of feeling that I am constantly battling against his mum.

He has never really held a job down for longer than a few weeks in his entire life and as his mum pays him between 350 and 500 a week, he spends his life just bumming around and taking drugs.  His mum has been trying to pay him to stay away from me for a while and now she has finally won.

My problem is that I am soon to have his baby and they are both telling me that they want nothing to do with the child and will not pay any kind of child support.

Child's hand, but no support from wealthy family Although I am not after their money, it would be helpful to receive some kind of financial and it's not as if it doing so would leave them broke.  It's not for me, it's for their own flesh and blood!  When I say wealthy I mean they must have over a million in the bank, what is 50 a week towards helping give our child some sort of life?

Although financial suport would be helpful, I will manage without it if necessary.  The thing I can't understand is how anyone can completely deny the existance of their own child or grandchild.  My baby has done nothing wrong and I cannot deal with knowing I am about to bring a baby into the world without a dad.  I believe that it is important for a child to have some sort of contact with their biological father.

I am truly sorry I ever got involved with these people and they have certainly taught me that MONEY is indeed the route of all evil.  I also now really understand how important family is.

By: Anonymous

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Everyone on this site is so stuck up I dont think ill bother looking at it again. Why do you all think that a single mum is doomed? I live a perfect life. I have 9 great kids who can do what thry want- ay theyre happy! No I dont work because I cant afford too. My best advice to this girl go and have a load more and take the system for everything

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Respect our government - 27-Apr-11 18:04 

Please stop speaking crap,Tinks. Disagreeing with someone is not bullying. For example, I disagree with most people that global warming is happening right now. Does this make me a bully?

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DSG - 26-Apr-11 15:36 

Two people have a responsibility for the child's support - mother and father although just why a 21 year old student feels she is a fit and proper person to become a mother is unclear.

The father's relatives (including his mother) have no liability.

This is, of course, assuming the father is over 18.

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Congo - 26-Apr-11 13:48 

So,Tinks, we are getting closer to your definition of "bullying". It is disagreeing with someone's decision (or simply agreeing with someone else who disagrees, if you can follow me) when the OP has asked for advice. As I said, my advice was meant for others anyway. What's wrong with that, pray tell?

As I currently cannot access the previous comments (would someone else tell me if they can please, or is it something for Kenny to sort out?) I cannot now find out if I have said anything before on this particular gripe, or exactly what Sarah said that I agreed with!

Anyway, until you become site administrator, Tinks, I don't think it's up to you to admonish others for leaving comments; and your definition of bullying is way off the mark. In my opinion, of course.

+8

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grumpyoldwoman - 26-Apr-11 07:17 

I didnt include granny g because she actually is just genuinly disagreeing wereas you 3 are just being plain nasty with your useless comments!

+2

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Tinks - 25-Apr-11 22:03 

I didnt include granny g in 'my list of bullies' I replied to her comment I didnt say she was a bully! I called you 3 because your comments arnt advice, its un-needed banter about how she shouldnt have got into such a position etc - how is that going to help her now? Shes already in the position and she needs help were to go from here, not people telling her what she shouldve done in the first place - DOH!!!

-6

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Tinks - 25-Apr-11 22:01 

By the way, Tinks, why have you not included Granny G in your list of "bullies"?

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grumpyoldwoman - 25-Apr-11 11:22 

So it's bullying if more than one person disagrees then. Well. I still say "oh dear".

Just for the record, not having a baby in Anonymous' position was serious advice, meant for others thinking of getting themselves into her position.

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grumpyoldwoman - 25-Apr-11 11:07 

Oh and to sara l especially, how would u feel if this woman actually did throw herself under a bridge after your vile comment?!

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Tinks - 24-Apr-11 16:44 

By bullying I mean ganging up and making this woman feel like dirt. You have no right. She didnt ask for you 3 to jump on the moral band wagon, she was asking for some serious advice. Your comments wernt needed!

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Tinks - 24-Apr-11 16:41 

So disagreeing with someone is now "bullying". Oh dear.

This site is doomed!

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grumpyoldwoman - 24-Apr-11 12:20 

Replying to granny g no his mother is not responsible for her child but that didnt stop her sticking her nose in making threats and the sort did it! You grandparents cant have it every way!

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Tinks - 23-Apr-11 21:19 

Grumpy old woman, sara l & mike p, bullies!! Say no more!
Returning to the gripe, he sounds like a spoilt little mummys boy and your better off without them! His mother sounds like a snob, as though she is ashamed that her son has got a woman pregnant on such weak groundings. If that is the case I would openly name ans shame the pair of them to society for the liw life that they are. The father is dodging his responcabilities and so you should contact the csa imediatly after the child is born. He may not be working now but he will have to at some point and when the csa catch up with him, he and his mother will eat thier words!

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Tinks - 23-Apr-11 21:17 

Granny G, are you the grandmother of her baby? If not then I can't understand why've you left a comment so insensitive and full of unwarranted bile...

The OP needs the money to subsidise the baby; she will not spend the money on herself. She has clearly written that both (the son and mother) are denying this child and that both are refusing to pay which is, of course, illegal. Nowhere has she blamed the mother for the pregnancy.

As you wrote, the OP has responsibility for her child. Therefore this man(haha)'s mother should be responsible for her son. His mother should be telling him what an irresponsible and selfish prat he is being; she should not be supporting him in his decision or even recommending it. A baby takes two to make and it should take two to raise, but failing that then it should be two to support. No? Is that so hideously unjust to you, Granny G? Is the man blameless for the baby? Did she trick him into having sex?! Should he deny his child? Is this man's mother morally right in refusing her grandchild? Do you think men should just skip off away from their children and leave the women to cope alone? Is that the world you want to live in? I hope you're a troll.

To the OP, it's been a while since you posted so I hope this has been resolved amicably. Whatever the outcome, I wish you and your baby a very, very, very happy future. Take care xx

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Tat - 12-Nov-10 18:49 

Why should his mother subsidise YOU? She didn't decide to have a child - YOU did. I am sure you knew what CAUSED them before you HAD one. I'm also sure you had some inkling as to this young man's character BEFORE you chose to get pregnant with his baby. It is NOT his mother's responsibility my dear - it is YOURS.

-4

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Granny G - 5-Oct-10 11:58 

Well now you know how millions of men feel....Welcome to the club !!!

+1

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Funk Soul Guy - 7-May-10 03:43 

Yes because im sure your a saint - NOT.

being sterilised at birth is not the truth, it has nothing to do with what this women was asking.

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joke - 10-Dec-09 09:39 

Bit harsh? Some people just don't like to read the truth, which is often harsh.

+2

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MikeP - 7-Dec-09 20:04 

sara L, Mike P and grumpy old women - bit harsh. she was with her partner for 2.5 years and shes 21 not bludy 13, when she decides to have kids has nothing to do with this matter.. its totaly up to her.

she wants to know how could anyone abandon there own flesh and blood?!? - which to be honest I dont know.. some people are just built selfish...

and some (sara L, Mike P and grumpy old women) RUDE

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joke - 7-Dec-09 16:28 

I totally think the comments by the likes off sara L, Mike P and grumpy old women are out of order. What if this girl is againist aboration?? Things happen, children are the most precious thing in the world to dicard them like that is sickening, And as for throwing herself off bridge?? Please I wont even dignify that with an answer. Yes of course I agree with the contraceptive argument but at the end of the day its happened now!
The way the family are speaking they will never really accept this child you will just have to pull yourself together and get on with it even thought it will be hard. You be the best mum u can be and the baby wont miss a thing. Some men can discard of there own flesh and blood. why? god knows hard to understand but true. I hope all works out as best as it can be for u.

+1

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Youngmum - 15-Nov-09 15:54 

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