I hate cutting the grass
12-May-2008
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I hate cutting the grass

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I like the summer months because I enjoy the sunshine and nice weather, but one thing I can't stand, is getting the lawn mower out to cut the grass every other weekend.  I simply cringe when it's that time again!

Getting the lawnmower out to cut the grass

Cutting the grass has definitely got to be my worst nightmare because the damn stuff just grows so quickly.  You get the mower out on a Saturday morning along with all the other sad suburban people.  You walk up and down for half an hour with this thing chewing up the turf, punctuated with little diversions as you come across a stone you didn't spot earlier, or to change yet another blade!  If you're lucky enough to own the model with a grass, collection box, then you may make several trips to empty it.

They're never quite big enough are they?  If you have the basic mower then there's a bit of raking to do afterwards.  I think that lawn maintenance is really a load of hassle that a person could well do without on a day of work that is supposed to be for rest and relaxation.

I know some people love gardening and can potter around for hours out there weeding, cutting, clipping, digging and doing all sorts of green things.  It's not for me though, I'd rather be doing something more interesting.  However, you can't escape it because it wouldn't do to let the grass grow would it?  What would the neighbours say?  There would be complaints to the council about that jungle next door.  Don't get me wrong, I actually enjoy having a cut lawn and wouldn't really want to let it go wild; its just that I hate having to cut it all the time and I can't afford to buy a remote control lawnmower.  That would be nice though...  So much better than the Astro-Turf solution! Mind you, I think maybe my next door neighbour has the right solution, he gets his kid to do it!

On the subject of lawnmowers, what's up with the rubbish they make these days?  You either get the thirty to forty quid hover power thing that eats up blades like they are going out of fashion, or you fork out for an expensive petrol one that does lovely stripes but costs a fortune to service (apparently).  I can't really comment on the latter because I've never owned one.  However, a friend of mine had one and it cost a small fortune to have it repaired and serviced.  He said that it would have been cheaper to buy a new one.


Cutting the grass and lawnmowers

How high to cut the grass
Some general information about lawnmowers and grass cutting, specifically how high to cut the grass in this case.

Robotic Lawnmower
Oh this is just about as cool as it gets, a robotic lawnmower that takes all the effort out of cutting the grass. I have just got to get myself one of these toys!

Genetically engineered grass
How about some slow growing grass so you don't have to cut it so often? This is a thought provoking article about this very concept. Wouldn't it be great if you only had to cut the grass once a year?

Artificial grass
Okay, so you REALLY can't be bothered cutting the grasss so why not just replace it with artificial grass that you never need to mow? This site offers a range of artificial grass from 0.5sqm to 1000sqm with next day delivery. What ever happened to Astro Turf anyway? You can find out all about that on this site as well.


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Get your partner to do it. Is it such a challenge to you that you have to post it as a gripe?

Tell me, what do you do if you want a sh*t?

I'll write what I think, I think you are a thief, an oxygen thief! You are depriving some needy human being of good oxygen.

Go take yer head for a sh*t, lazy b$%^&*d.
*Johna  09-Nov-2007 19:21

 
Why do you do it, get the old "ball and chain" on the job!
*Monty  09-Nov-2007 12:39

 
Water the grass with wiskey. At least then it will come up half cut
*leomonkey  05-Mar-2007 15:06

 
I hate cutting the grass too and avoid the lawnmower like the plague. I do like to sit in a nice garden, but I find mowing quite frustrating. It's probably because I leave it too long, but by the time I get home from work on those summer evenings I'm too tired to go out and cut the grass. At the weekend I've always got other things to do like spending time with the family or getting out and about and when I do decide to do it, it rains of course.

I might look at these robotic mowers. They look like fun - assuming the actually work okay and get the job done that is.
*Matt  20-Feb-2007 11:20

 
Lawn grows too fast - have to mow it twice a week, alsmost as bad as shaving. I have no time to mow because I'm always at work, or shaving before I go to work (see Shaving Gripe). I pay a lad to mow it for me but he's insanely emotional; I have constantly to attend to his needs and keep him happy so he keeps moving. It's like having another damn girlfriend!

The city gives one a monetary fine if one's lawn is not constantly kept in a state of 'mow'.
*The Other Guy  11-Nov-2006 15:29

 
If you don't wanna cut the Fu(kin lawn, then don't nobodys gonna sue you if you don't, you just be a lazy pig and look at it grow
*sdfkged  23-Aug-2006 18:25

 
Cant we just cut the grass by looking at it how good would that be
*lisa  16-Jul-2006 19:09

 
He he lawn mower man you are very funny!

Lawns are just great aren't they?

I think we should start an 'I love lawns club' Wotd'ya reckon?
*The Lawnster  11-Mar-2006 01:14

 
sorry that message was for me Nikki
*your husband  16-Dec-2005 14:12

 
Can't wait for the summer when the lawnmowers (and lawnmower owners) are out. Sunny days will come soon.. .
*Grasshopper  06-Nov-2005 20:34

 
Wow! I seem to have scored twice in one day! Firstly, I receive a text message whilst I am blurry eyed driving to work at 8 am. I had pulled in to a lay by to read it:

"Hi", it said. "I've just got out the shower and I'm wet and horney".

Sadly, the message was for my 18 year old daughter, but it was nice whilst it lasted.

Then I discover that I've got a "chunky-framed bloke with a throbbing 24" petrol mower" on my doorstep!

I live in the depths of the countryside near Daventry - with my husband !
*Nikki  10-Aug-2005 14:15

 
Nikki Doll. You dont wanna be seeing my chunky frame on a throbbing petrol 24-blade green machine. I'm from coventry. We have the best cut lawns in town. Yeehaa!
*Lawnmower man  09-Aug-2005 00:12


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